The Importance of Mourning
This week has been a week of mourning for me and those around me, a week of a looming separation, of a relationship ending and the loss of a wonderful and influential life. All things that warrant and deserve mourning. Anything that we feel as a loss, no matter how small it appears to others is worthy of processing because it is what we feel. Our feelings do not adhere to societal norms, people’s expectations or even our own expectations for that matter. We don’t get to decide how we’ll feel about something but we do get to decide how to deal with those feelings.
We often work so hard on either “getting over” things quickly or avoiding our emotions altogether. It’s as though we imagine we’re being judged on how long we are upset and whether it’s an “appropriate” reaction. So many of us see weakness in mourning but Conquering Life is here to say that healthy mourning can be an incredibly powerful tool. Mourning is the way our minds and bodies were designed to process grief. Mourning isn’t wallowing in self pity or feeding into catastrophic thinking patterns, but rather it’s allowing yourself the space to feel the root of that pain.
There is no right amount of time or exact way to mourn because every person and situation is different. But everyone was born with the capacity to cry for a reason – it is how we simultaneous experience and release painful feelings. Oftentimes, giving yourself the space to cry leads on to more positive emotions. Giving ourselves permission to grieve is a form of self comfort and by releasing the emotions that a tragedy or loss has brought we can get to the healing process. It’s also important to remember that moving on is all right, it doesn’t mean that we didn’t love or value our loss, it is simply the human act of moving forward. Grieving is our chance to honour our feelings and that which we are mourning.
So whether you’re processing a change in your life, a parting of ways or the loss of a loved one, it’s important to give yourself some time to mourn. Even if tears aren’t your thing, giving yourself a safe space in which to just sit with yourself and your emotions can be beneficial. Maybe take an evening at home with a movie, a nice hot bath or a solitary stroll through a park. Once you’ve had some time to process I find a hug always makes me feel better. These are a just a few ways to mourn, but you’ll know which way is best for you – just listen to your heart and give it the chance to lead because sometimes through mourning we find the road to recovery. So if you’re dealing with something yourself I send you a hug and I encourage you to take some time for yourself and as always, Conquer Life!